It's not something you feel. It's something you DO.

Love.

I listen to the stories of others and feel their confusion.  Their pain.  Their bewilderment.  The despair threaded through the last decaying blooms of hope.  And I recognize so much of what they're going through.  I'm powerless to help, but I can listen, and I can tell them what I learned.

When it happens to someone close, a family member, someone going through health issues, it's 100 times more heartbreaking.  And my fierce protectiveness rises up and I feel like a protective warrior willing to take the pain, the wounds, every emotional hit and bleed until I'm spent.  But it never really happens like that, does it?  Dammit.  But I would.  Oh, but I would.

I see the signs and recognize the hateful phrases and hurtful behaviors in her.  I'm glad he's tough, and I'm glad to see his self-esteem isn't trashed like mine was, and still is in many ways.  I raised my sons to be strong inside, yet gentle and kind, respectful.  I suppose those are the ones who end up getting the worst of it sometimes.

I don't get in the middle of their marriage and never will.  It's not my place.  I don't treat her badly, because that's wrong.  But if she abuses him further.. I won't remain quiet for much longer.  I keep my peace for his sake.  High blood pressure and an ulcer at such a young age is telling, and the erratic, crazy behavior, the uncaring attitude she displays... isn't going to bode well for her.

I did warn him to day to protect his health and his life, because this is not the same thing as taking a bullet to save your child or loved one.  You simply don't risk a heart attack or stroke or bleeding ulcer (or worse if it doesn't heal!) by staying with someone who isn't on board with your getting healthy!

He said she gets angry if his stomach is painful and he chooses not to go out do something she wants to do.  She gets angry because he has to eat a low-sodium diet and doesn't eat pizza or something else that will harm his health.  When he does things to take care of his health, when he chooses to eat right, not eat or drink things that will harm his health... she gets angry and tells him.. "It's always about you!"  I mean, what the actual hell??!!

And... she's taken to yelling at him for, of all things, paying his child support!

One of his friends works on a pipeline and is possibly being promoted soon.  If that happens, he will be putting a crew together, and he stated my son would be perfect for his crew.  This would mean traveling for work for my son.

I hope my son gets this job.