Whatever the Hell That Means

Normal.  No idea what that means anymore.  Every day something changes, and I'm left completely taken aback by the sheer ridiculousness of it all.  But is it really ridiculous, or is it just that I'm finding I can't sort through the mess on my own and come to any conclusions as to how I'm going to deal with this ever-changing situation with my health?  I've gone back and forth so many times with this and have yet to come up with anything that makes any sense at all.  Maybe it's time I stop trying to make sense of what this is and focus on living with what I'm dealt with for the time being.  And maybe, just maybe, I need my head examined. ;p Okay, so that's always a given, isn't it?

My focus is lost as well, and that's to be expected I suppose.  Being sick, really sick isn't something that inspires keen insight and razor-sharp focus, now does it?  I get that, and I accept that as my reality at the moment. Still, where do I go from here?

I'm not sure who's reading all blogs, some of my blogs, or just one... but I've been trying to sort through this newness from every angle, and as you can imagine.. I'm mostly failing.  New symptoms jumped on board today, others have returned from my anemic past, and I'm left sitting here wondering who I can, if anyone, to ask for a re-test of my ferritin levels.  Things is, I'm just too damn tired, too sick... to want to deal with leaving messages for nurses and waiting for a return phone call to state my case.

Nausea and a complete absence of an appetite; a huge change from yesterday.

Prednisone is known for messing with blood sugar, known for massive water retention, and a plethora of other undesirable side effects.  They're necessary evils for those who have to take it to avoid potentially life-threatening complications of various diseases.  In my case, I'm using it to get my body in remission from autoimmune hepatitis, something that will destroy my liver if I leave it untreated.  I accept what must be done, of course.  In the meantime, up until today I've had to fight off relentless hunger, which is a common side effect of Pred.  Today.. is quite a different story altogether...

I noticed a few days ago that my taste has changed, and while at first it was only slightly noticeable, today a wave of nausea hit me and I realized my hunger was absolutely and completely GONE.  In fact, the thought of food makes me sick to my stomach.  This is a major turnaround and one I'm not quite sure what to do with.  And yesterday, my tongue felt sore... as it does today, and with that soreness is an almost numbness.  What gives?

No answers yet.  But I'm starting to wonder if the prednisone has already begun messing with my blood sugar in a major way.  I'm choosing not to think that, but instead.. I'm thinking maybe the anemia is returning.  I don't know WHAT the hell is going on, but I can tell you I don't like it one single bit.

So now what?

I have absolutely NO idea.