It could very well be I'm still not quite recovered from the epic crash I experienced yesterday, something I'm assuming is Azathioprine side effects kicking in. My Dr. increased the dosage big time, so I guess it's bound to happen, and from what I've read it's going to take a few days or so for the side effects to ease. Until then, I just have to go with the flow and be nice to my body.
It didn't help that I woke up to a mess to clean up in the kitchen. This wouldn't be an issue except for two things: 1) The mess was necessary and created out of carelessness. 2) T didn't bother to clean any of it up. Something spilled on the cabinets, the floor, the counter. It's really difficult right now for me to bend over to do anything because of the wicked lower back pain. But I do what I have to do when I can, and this particular mess couldn't be ignored. I'll pay the price for having cleaned it up, but again... I do what I have to do.
If I could just wake up one day, just ONE day, and not have messes to clean up. If I could just have that little bit of 'nice' first thing in the morning, that would be awesome. I'm sitting here, yes, remembering that particular brand of peace that comes from living alone. I know a lot of people understand this, because I've spoken to a few lately about this very thing.
So how do I get this 'peace' here and now? Not sure, exactly, because there's so much going on, so much that needs addressing. My health. Issues with T's indifference and carelessness in many matters. I don't even know where to begin until my body reminds me that it all starts with good health.
My dream, my goal.. is to just get healthy. And boy, that's another talk show after what I experienced yesterday....
....Another talk show entirely.
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